Make Babies

The arrangements people make

There’s no single right way to make a family. Here are some of the arrangements people come to Just a Baby for.

• A couple. Two people who meet, fall for each other and decide to have a baby together. It happens here, though it’s never a promise.
• Co-parents. Two or more people who choose to raise a child together without being a couple.
• A known dad. A man who helps a woman or a couple have a baby and stays in the child’s life, in a role they all agree on.
• A helper. A man or a woman who helps someone else become a parent, then steps back. Known, not anonymous.
• A woman who carries for someone. A woman who’s open to carrying a baby for a person or couple who can’t. That’s surrogacy, eventually. It starts with meeting someone.

Plenty of arrangements fall somewhere in between, and some change shape over time. What they share is that the people in them chose each other. Nobody has to fit a box here. Pick the shape that fits you, and say so. Some start with romance. Some never involve it. All of them work best when everyone says what they want out loud, and early.

Call it what you like

The words on this site are the ones people search for: sperm donor, egg donor, surrogate, co-parent. They’re useful for finding a page. They’re not much use for describing a family.

The first families made with a helper’s sperm were made in secret, in a time when the word donor was never spoken out loud, least of all to the child. That time has passed. Here’s the short history, if you’re curious. Families today are open about how they began, and they’ve started inventing better words for the people in them. Known donor, dad, sperm daddy, auntie, a first name, or something nobody has said before. Some of those will sound odd to you. One might sound exactly right, or you might find your own.

One more thing. Whatever words you land on, nobody here is doing anyone a favor. A baby needs all of you, and you’re making something together. The words should feel like that.

We don’t think it’s our place to pick. Just a Baby introduces people. What you call each other is yours: now, along the way, and long after. Leave room for the child to find words of their own one day, too.

Co-parenting

Co-parenting means two or more people agreeing to raise a child together. They might be friends. They might have just met. They’re usually not a couple. What they share is a child, and a promise to each other about how they’ll raise that child.

Just a Baby isn’t custody software, and it doesn’t draw up agreements. It’s where co-parents find each other in the first place. You say what you hope for. You meet people who hope for something similar. You talk until you know whether you could build a family together.

The conversations that matter are the practical ones. Where will the child live? How will you share the days and the decisions? What happens if one of you moves? Ask the awkward ones early. Talk them through with each other, and then with a lawyer and a doctor.

A dating app for people who want kids

If you searched for a dating app for people who want kids, here’s the honest answer. Just a Baby is family first. People meet here, and some find a partner along the way, when both want that. It’s never a promise, and not everyone is looking for it. Nobody here has to hide that they want children. Nobody has to pretend they’re only after a coffee.

Serendipity tends to work that way. You find what you weren’t looking for. We leave that part to you. Say what you’re hoping for: a partner, a co-parent, or simply someone who wants a family as much as you do.